Guest Review – 2012

November 20, 2009


Guest Review – 2012 (right click and “save as” for download).

We were contacted by regular listener Dan (from the bath as mentioned in Casta the Friendly Ghost) who asked if he could do a guest review of the new UBER DISASTER FEST 2012.

Being the kind chaps that our mothers brought us up to be, we were only too happy to oblige – whilst also sticking our two penneth in… naturally.

Take a listen and if you’d like to take a stab yourself in the same way as young Dan, then contact us at and we’ll let you know how you can get involved.




Review – The Men Who Stare at Goats

November 19, 2009

‘Tis the year of the movie moustache! First Brad Pitt in Inglourious Basterds, now George Clooney in The Men Who Stares At Goats. I love it when beautiful people put things on their face which cause you to forget just how much better than you they really are.

Of course, The Men Who Stare At Goats isn’t just a story about one person’s tireless efforts to act a bit weird and sport a badass moustache. It’s a story of one man, played by Ewan ‘annoyingly accurate American accent’ McGregor, coming to terms with loss by running away to war, only to stumble upon a crazy psychic spy (step up George you fantastically moustached bastard) who takes him on a road trip to save his old army buddy (Jeff Bridges) who told George in a dream where to find him. Or did he? More of that later. It’s also a story where “more of this is true than you would care to believe”. Or so the title at the beginning claimed.

And here in lies the crux of my problem with The Men Who Stare At Goats. Whilst the above title is a wonderfully alternative version of those dreaded words ‘Based on a true story’, it still remains nothing more than a license for the creators of this film to say “some of this is true. In fact, quite a lot of this is true. But some of it is also false. And by false I mean jazzed up for the narrative to skip along at a decent pace”.
So when that final act showdown at the hidden Army Base goes down I can’t help but feel like this might be the bit that was stuck on at the end of a rather ‘nice true story which actually kind of tailed off towards the end’ in order to make it work as a film and have everybody leave the theatre feeling semi-good inside.

I didn’t hate The Men Who Stare At Goats. It made me laugh, it made me think. Clooney is always worth the ticket price and Bridges and Kevin Spacey- himself a proud wearer of a quite impressive lip warmer- were equally excellent. I have my reservations about Ewan McGregor, I know there are good performances out there, but I remain unconvinced when he appears in something as idiosyncratic as this. But I’m biased because all I waste when I go to the cinema is time, not money (NOTE: if you do not have an Unlimited Card by now and live within 5 miles of a Cineworld you probably have a terminal illness), and I wonder whether I would have given allowances based on performance and ‘a decent soundtrack’ had I paid to watch this.

Another element to this film which bites is related to a conversation we had in the latest episode of Casta. Chris pointed out that a fault with The Fourth Kind lay in the audience’s suspension of disbelief that what was happening on screen was actually happening- in the case of that film that the video footage is real. In a similar way The Men Who Stare At Goats faces the same problem; do we believe that these soldiers actually have powers? Certainly there are scenes which prove they do, yet the main thrust of the narrative, the road trip, which is explained to us as a ‘psychic journey’, threw several road blocks in my way as to whether I thought the characters were actually being guided along their path by George’s wonderful- Jedi- mind, or by blind luck and chance. That the bulk of the psychic evidence is told to McGregor’s protagonist second-hand also caused me to doubt its plausibility.

Which is all the more reason why the very last shot of the film is so completely unbelievable, and actually ruined the film for me.

Wait for it to come out on DVD, and then borrow it off a friend.

Episode 6 – Casta Pussycat! Kill! Kill!

November 17, 2009

Casta Pussycat! Kill! Kill! (right click and “save as” for download)


So here it is, your next dose of Casta La Vista in which we discuss world cinema, banish found footage and discover that Chrazza Mazza really needs to see more films.



November 9, 2009


Ever find yourself extremely confused as to who the hell is writing anything on here? Who is this Chrazza Mazza? And what about that good looking Chrazza Wazza guy I’ve heard so much about? Who’s he?

Well sit in wonder no longer! Thanks to our fine fine friend Stephen Hitchen (creator of the most excellent Ste-Regular) we are very happy to present ourselves in a stunning new visual format!



Chrazza WazzaChrazza Mazza

                Chrazza Wazza                                Chrazza Mazza



Review – 9

November 8, 2009



Imagine a world where everyone and everything living is dead. Then imagine that a scientist whose fault it was that everything died (albeit indirectly) created some sackpeople to try and stop the thing that killed everyone. Imagine they succeed and everything stays dead. Congratulations, you’ve just imagined the whole of 9.

I hope in previous efforts I’ve made it clear that I’m really not into spoiling narratives and giving plots away but in this case I feel like it’s really the only way to highlight just how uninvolving this film is. I know I’m a bit of a stickler and a fuddy duddy but there’s this thing that I’ve made frequent reference to in the past and I feel somewhat ridiculous in bringing it up again but I’m going to and you’re just going to have to like it. That thing is investment – when it comes to movies it doesn’t matter entirely what you’re invested in, as long as you’re invested in something.

9 gives you absolutely nothing to invest in.

Some stuff happens, some sackpeople die, some don’t and that’s about it. At no point did I actually care whether or not the sackpeople managed to do whatever it was they were trying to do as I couldn’t actually see how it mattered. We’re told early on that 9 (the main sack person) is very important as only he can stop the bad thing, but then he causes the bad thing to happen before stopping it – killing numerous other sackpeople in the process. It just didn’t make sense and that really annoyed me.

So what’s good about it then? Well the visuals are very competent, but that’s about it. I could go on about the film’s other flaws – the wafer thin plot and its inherent holes, the underuse of voice talent (there’s some real heavy hitters in there), the extremely confused marketing (I literally have no idea who this film’s intended audience is) – but I really can’t be bothered.

I’m well aware that my reviews are usually twice this length but I genuinely have nothing else to say about this film. There are films out there which I think are terrible but people still love and I can kind of understand that because there are terrible films that I love too. I guarantee you however that this film will not fall into that distinction – there’s just nothing in it to love.

It’s by no means a bad film, it’s just a total non-event. It really is a long time since I’ve felt so disconnected and indifferent towards a movie and as far as I’m concerned, that’s a whole lot worse than me hating it.

Episode 5 – Casta the Friendly Ghost

November 4, 2009




Casta the Friendly Ghost (right click and “save target as” for download)


Scary stuff eh? We are proud to offer for your delectation the newest episode of everyone’s favourite* podcast in which we mostly talk about horror and about how average I (chrazza mazza) think it is.



* may not actually be everyone’s favourite podcast